Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Of Reciprocal Gender

Slowpork edition.

So, an artists was bashed by the society, i bet because she joined an event made for the weirdo.

She defends herself by saying that its one of her way to get to know them and try to understand their life, their so called dark life nobody really knows, unless u've friends and befriend someone like them.

Niat tak menghalalkan cara.
I do agree with the statementz.
But hey, when there's no other way to help somebody, the last resort fall on u. The judgement? Leave them shit to god. Who are u to judge?

What makes u think that democratic ways of doing things is the most appropriate means?
Even our government still use the ISA to punish those people who claimed to commit treason. Is that democratic enuff? Have u found any statement in your holy books stating all that shit? If you do, feel free to share that shit with me.

You can still say that there's a lot of ways to get to know those 'special' people. You can propose this and that. But Have you in any way possible approach them and try to understand what they do feel inside? What they face with the community? What's their problem and shit?

Haha. I bet the answer is, 'hell no'.

The problem with the community is they fast putting the judgement on the first topic of discussion without properly understanding the content of the topic. I'd love to see how you handle them special people if they're apart of your family. I'd love to call them special because they are special. If u wanna play the blame game, u can blame god since he was the one who make all these shit happened. Seriously, the blame game will never end if u never try to suffocate that awkward feelings into you.

In the end, at least someone did something, far better than you who only talk and talk and talk endlessly about  the theory in your beautiful mind. 

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Consequences

Bila kau dah famous, kata kata yang kau tuturkan jadik fatwa. Fatwa manusia yang obses dengan diri kau. Fanatik menyembah. Pembenci sumpah seranah. Society perhati, malas nak menambah.

Bila ramai taksub, kau jadik dewa, kau jadik tuhan, Kau jadi mabuk perhatian.
Jangan risau, tu semua ungkapan. Khayalan saraf saraf otak yang kau selalu agungkan.

Sampai satu masa kau akan sedar, kau masih berada dalam lingkup tingkahlaku permainan.
Kau dengan kebodohan kau. Kau dengan dogma kau. Kau masih lagi kau yang dulu.

Jangan risau, kau mesti tau putaran roda, putaran jam randik, putaran bumi, putaran hidup. Semuanya sama. Semuanya akan kembali ke tempat asal. Mana kau mula, situ kau habiskan.

Esok tak menjanjikan apa apa pulangan yang lumayan kalau kau tak senyawakan kehidupan untuk ke depan. Perhentian tak membataskan pergerakan. Kau yang tentukan. Walaupun kau tak percayakan tuhan.


Monday, April 18, 2011

Perhatian!!!

Semua orang ada tempat dia bekerja.
Penulis sekarang tulis dekat laptop, tak pakai typewriter. Walaupun nafsu menulis tu lagi membuak2 bila kau menulis menggunakan pen dekat atas sehelai kertas. #serius. Aku tak label diri aku penulis, tapi as long as aku menulis, aku adalah penulis. #dealwithit

Kalau kau ____________ (masukkan profession), kau pun ada tempat kau kerja kau sendiri.
Aku pasti kau tak suka bila orang tengok kau buat kerja. kan?
Melainkan kau ni kerja memang depan orang macam pembaca berita, pornstar, ahli silap mata etc etc.

Samalah macam aku. Aku paling tak suka bila sape2 termasuk kau tengok aku tekan2 huruf2 atas keyboard ni jadik satu karangan yang mampu puaskan hati aku.
Aku tak suka kau tengok aku menulis (read : typing)

So, kalau kau ada kawan2 yang menulis, jangan kacau dia menulis. Dia pun tak hingin kau baca apa yang dia tengah tulis. Nanti rasa macam bodoh. Kau pergi la baca ape yang dia publish nanti. Kalau dia tulis novel, beli novel dia, baca puas2, tenung puas2, tatap puas2. Bawak p jamban bole, bawak p tidur pon bole. Tapi tolong lah jangan kacau dia tengah siapkan ape yang dia tulis tu. Kalau kau ni manusia yang considerate, tolong jangan kacau. Kalau dia tulis blog, kau baca lepas dia publish post tu. Lepastu kau nak print ke nak kojol ke nak terjun KB Mall ke itu kau punya hal.

Kau suka tak aku kacau kau berak? Kalau tak suka, jangan kacau orang lain tengah buat kerja dia. Bagi dia space dia. Bila kau ade kat sebelah, rasa macam ada babi dekat sebelah tahu? Hilang semua idea idea dia. Kau nak gantirugi ke? Idea ni rege dia lagi mahal dari harga bumi tahu? Kau mampu bayar ke gantirugi?

So, aku nak ingat kan semua orang yang ada dalam circle aku and dalam circle readers aku, jangan buat ape yang aku dah cakap kat atas. Itupun kalau kau ni manusia la. Kalau kau buat jugak, sah kau babi. Babi hutan. Wild Boar omputehnye.
Ciao~


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Beza Kerja Untuk Kuli & Bos

Theres 2 types of jobs i personally put into criteria in this world.
yeah, 2.

One is thinking and another one is labouring

The thinking jobs needs brain while the labouring jobs needs physical movement so that all the jobs is done properly.

But bear in mind,

You can choose but 1 or both jobs criteria i've given above. But most of us do both, but each capacity is different on each jobs and position. Thats how it works.You can't finish your job only with thinking, and thats where the labouring parts take place. But you can't finish the jobs u're on when u don't know how to properly finish it. Thats where the thinking phase helps.

The thinking part needs brain that not everybody have, especially in the specialize part where not everybody can finish.
Example?
We need a doctor to DIAGNOSE  the patients health and sickness but the nurse is doing most of the labouring works. We need an engineer to think of the way to make an engine. But all the hard work fall on the labour's shoulder.

Most labouring jobs can be done by everyone capable of doing it with some instructions of here and there. But not everyone can think like what the thinkers can do.

That differentiate our purpose in life.

See, if everybody in this world think and think and think endlessly, no one's gonna end up making something  but just only think. Like Mat Jenin and all his dreams with no effort to walk the dream.

But thats what all the labourer in this world have contribute to this world. They end up doing all the job that's need to be done.

Don't wonder why all the thinkers gets the name while the labour gets nothing but all the sweats of working.

And that also differentiate the pay/wages/ and salary. Though thinking seems like an easy jobs to get done with, not everybody is equipped with Brains to think as wise as every thinker can. Thats why most thinkers get all the money they deserve in this world. U copy?

The labour end up labouring because they have less capacity to think like the thinkers and thats why they end up being the labour. If u got brains and u're doing all the labours job, thats underemployment, so, get a better job and start working with the capacity u've had.

The world's not gonna function in a proper manner if everybody is rich but the world can still roll around if everybody is poor. lulz~

But still, there's yin yang to every single thing on earth or in another word, balance.
U know how it works?
Every born babies will be justified with death from war, natural catastrophe, AIDS, and every single feel good sense u had in ur mind. Every stupidity will be blast with "U're Fucking Stupid" just to justify the condition plus the middle finger and all. Every happiness will be balanced with sadness every once in a while to balance it all.

So, every thinker needs all the proletariat A.K.A labourers in the world to fulfill each demand in the world. There we go, we need each other for fuck sake and nobody can tell me they're more important that anybody else just because u're up there and i'm down here climbing up and consequently putting my feet on your head for fun.

Have a good day thinking of what i've been thinking people.
Happy halloween. Err, Happy weekend fellas.
Have a good labouring days ahead and don't forget to smile fuckers.
May death be with you, and as always. I'm gonna end up this crappy bullshit of mine with......


Its my perspective. What's yours assholes?
hit me on the comment section, below~ or die in vein!

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Bacaan Hari Kiamat

Aku tak kenal diri sendiri. Yes. Aku tak kenal diri sendiri. Aku tak tau ape aku suka. Aku tak tau ape yang aku tak berapa nak suka. Aku tak tau ape yang aku nak. Gila ape manusia gaya macam ni? Takde pendirian pulak. Sebelum ni cakap pumpang pumpang air liur merembes macam squirt.

Hari hari aku kena seksa. Ye, kena seksa.
Hari2 kau kena buat pilihan. Buat pilihan itu adalah satu jenis seksaan batin yang kau paham bila kau kena pilih. Macam pilih kasut puma dekat butik puma. Kau tak suka satu pun, tapi kau kena pilih.
Mungkin aku tak suka sebab dalam butik puma tu takde satu pun jenis kasut yang aku suka, yang aku nak pakai lebih dari apa yang aku jangka. Kalau boleh, aku nak pakai kasut puma tu dekat semua occasion. Pergi mampos la occasion ape, formal ke tak formal ke. Janji aku pakai kasut tu. Sebab tu aku cakap aku tak suka buat pilihan.

As if doctrine pro choice tu satu beban yang menyeksakan. Kau pilih salah, kau tak pilih pon salah. Ditelan mati otak belah kanan, diluah mati otak belah kiri. Tak seimbang. Aku taknak hidup cacat, sape nak hidup cacat? Orang cacat pon taknak hidup cacat tahu? Kesian dengan orang2 cacat. Depa semuatak mintak pon dilahirkan cacat.

Orang cakap penantian itu satu penyeksaan, tapi membuat pilihan lagi seksa woi! Sumpah!
Rasa macam nak kerat tangan guna pisau atau kena gantung dekat tali gantung. Hangmans noose nama tali gantung tu.
Hah, mane satu kau nak pilih? Kau ade dua pilihan je ni tahu?

Tapi tulah, kau still kena pilih jugak. Deep inside, kau kena pilih. Kau tau kau kena pilih. Sakit ke tak tu belakang cerita. Kau kena pilih.
Kalau kau taknak pilih, kau kena mati dulu. Bila kau mati, kau dah tak payah pilih ape2. Sebab kau dah mati. Jasad kau dah mati. Ye, MATI.

Nak mati ke tak in the first place pun kena pilih tahu?
Lain la kalau malaikat pembunuh datang ambik nyawa kau masa ingatan kau berpinar menjerumus ke arah zaman silam kau. Malaikat pembunuh ni nama dia Izrail. Ni ikut orang Islam la. Kalau ikut cerita death note, nama malaikat dia shinigami. Kalau ditakdirkan tuhan nak rentap nyawa gwa sekarang ni, confirm lu orang tak dapat baca ape yang aku tulis dekat sini.

malaikat pembunuh = malaikat izrail = shinigami

Tapi jangan tanya kat aku ape yang roh A.K.A soul kau kena pilih. Itu bukan urusan aku. Jasad kau yang hidup ni la h yang tentukan ape yang soul kau buat lepas kau mati.

Theory manusia ada jasad and ada roh ni kadang2 bingai jugak. Babi ape dah mati pon kau hidup lagi? Hidup dalam bentuk roh. Roh tu ape? Jangan tanye aku. Aku tak tau. Kau pergi tanya ulamak ulamak, para tahfiz, agamawan dan mufti2 yang sibuk nak haramkan poco poco tu. Aku bukan orang kuat agama pon.

Aku agama apa? Aku sembah lucifer for teh lulz. Sebab lucifer cakap macam ni dekat aku "Kau nak buat ape kau buatlah, lantak pi lah" kan ke senang sembah lucifer?

Tuhan? Ye, semua orang yang percaya tuhan ada tuhan. Sebab tu aku mention tuhan dekat atas. Tak kisah la tuhan kau kayu ke pokok ke asap ke api ke tanah liat ke, yang penting dia tuhan. Tuhan kau yang mane satu kau pilih lah, hah, aku bagi pilihan ni. Jangan cakap aku tak bagi pilihan. Terang2 tuhan tu banyak kalau nak nampak dari segi masyarakat majmuk, even dekat malaysia. Orang malaysia, keseluruhannya banyak tuhan.
Sebab masing2 ada tuhan sendiri. Ikut kau lah nak pilih tuhan yang mane satu. Pilih jangan tak pilih!

Tapi yang best bila kau kena pilih, kau ada pilihan. Better dari take it or leave it.

Sebenarnya aku dah mengarut panjang sangat ni. Aku mengarut lebih dari ape yang harus aku karutkan.
Aku cuma nak cakap aku tak tau aku ni siapa. Tak, aku belum hilang ingatan, aku masih gunakan pseudonym Hellioz untuk jadik watak penulis dalam blog ni. Dekat luar, nama aku lain. Nama aku dekat luar...
Tak payah tau lah. Hidup aku kat luar dengan kat sini tak sama. Kau ni hellioz bahan ujikaji aku je. Kalau aku bosan2 je aku masuk lah dekat dunia internet ni untuk pakai topeng muka yang bernama Hellioz. Kau tau tapi buat buat tak tau. Kau ni bodoh ke ape?

Suka hati aku la nak buat ape dekat Hellioz. Kalau kau nak bikin karekter macam Hellioz, pergi la buat satu.

Lensarosak ade AlexiaAqram
AkuTakPeduli ada Melayu Minimalis
FreedomOfAssociation ade Obefiend
CursingMalay ada Mantot
BreakingTheRulez ada FrodoBaggins
SemuaKosong ada UstakBerd
RefurbishedJourney ada Siggplus
AkalTunjang Ada Hiro
TheBraderWhoDancesWithGhosts ade BraderLepLep
2+2=5 ade Afiqsiddhartha.
Tapi dah mati lah, Afiqsiddhartha bunuh. Kesian 2+2=5 dah mati. Takziah.
Saban hari bahan bacaan gwa berkurang.
(Sori la kalau aku tak mention nama semua orang. Kepala hotak aku kepala hotak manusia, bukan bionic boleh ingat nama semua orang.)

Biar la aku nak buat
AndItsAllAboutPerspectives~ yang dilakonkan Hellioz.
Takkan aku nak jadik macam kau. Tulis pasal kepala paip?
Baik aku tulis pasal kepala taik. kahkahkah.

Aku kena pilih lagi sekarang ni. Aku belum tidur lagi. Aku kena pilih nak pergi kelas ke taknak. Hah, kalau pergi kelas kurang2 bole la aku mintak prof aku doakan aku dapat A subject dia. Aku dala kaki ponteng. Celaka punya makhluk penyembah lucifer. kalau aku tak pergi aku boleh tidur nyenyak, macam babi, eyh, bayi. Tapi satu sen ilmu pon aku tak dapat. See, aku kena pilih lagi.

Aku tulis semua ni random habis. Mungkin sebab harini mood aku tak berapa nak baik sangat. Tapi aku suka betul kalau dapat tulis macam ni hari hari. Puas hati. Sumpah puas hati. Kalau kau tak puas hati, pegi mati. Kalau kau nak rasa menulis untuk diri sendiri, kau tulis je ape kau suka. Pedulikan ape orang kata. Janji kau tau ape yang kau nak buat tu. Betul ke salah belakang cerita. Kalau kau tak pernah buat silap, Kau takkan pernah berjaya dalam hidup.

Sebab bagi aku, kesilapan tu la yang buat aku jadik siapa aku hari ini. Ye, aku yang real. Bukan Hellioz. Hellioz ni kuda tunggangan aku je. Hellioz hidup dekat dalam dunia maya. Ye dunia maya. Tak real. Pentipu. Kau semua kena tipu dengan world wide web je tahu?

Dah, aku nak mandi, nak gosok gigi. Aku buat keputusan untuk pergi kelas. Lepas habis kelas mesti aku rindu professor aku. Dia kewl tahap gaban. Kalau aku ade member macam professor aku, mesti aku gembira.
Dah la.

Kau semua jaga diri baik baik ok. Buat pilihan yang betul. Buat aje pilihan. Janji kau pilih. Pilih pakai otak jangan pakai ponggong. Doa la dekat tuhan masing2 sebelum buat pilihan, mane tahu tuhan kau nak bagi kau guidance untuk memilih. Untung2 kau pilih jadik kaya, bukan jadik miskin.

Selamat merayakan pilihan.
Ciaozie~


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Monday, April 11, 2011

Percaya Tak?

1. Percaya tak Satu hari nanti, semua thoughtful blogger akan berhenti blogging and yang tinggal hanyalah blog2 yang post 3 ke 4 entry sehari semata2 nak carik trafik?

2. Percaya tak satu hari nanti yang tinggal hanyalah blogger2 yang bertudung shawl semata2 sebab masing2 nak jadik famous macam semua orang?

3. Percaya tak satu hari nanti yang tinggal hanyalah blog yang dikemaskini hanya sebab nak penuhi kehendak iklan2 kapitalis dari syarikat2 pengiklanan?

4. Percaya tak satu hari nanti semua orang mengeluh sebab 'terpaksa' baca blog ntah ape ape yang dah di over commercialized macam blog mama merah?

5. Percaya tak satu hari nanti aku akan gelak baca balik statement2 yang aku dah tulis dekat sini?

6. Percaya tak hellioz.blogspot.com bukan one man's blog?

7. Percaya tak semua benda kat atas ni akan berlaku?

8.Percaya tak?

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Hypogloria

My father used to be a pilot.
I bet u know how many dough he had in his bank. Plus his asset, his wealth and all.
He can grant your wish like a fairy godmother.

But i have never been pampered with all the wealth and all.
I used to have to collect my own money to buy anything i wanted since i was a little weenie till nao. Yeah, till nao. Every single thing, except all the things i need for my studies, of course.

I still remember how he said he crave for a coke worth 10cent when he was small. Yes, that bottled coke most of us no longer seen on most eateries shop.
He said he collect all his money from scratch just to have a drink of coke. Determination. I always hope that i have all of his determination in me. Just in case i have to start all over again from a scratch.

One thing for sure is, everybody's gon feel bored of all his same old story that is been told over and over again. I bet u'll feel the same way i do everytime that story is being told again and again.

The real deal is, i'm proud of him. Who wouldn't?
But his success is his very own achievement. Not mine. Me?
I'm still a student. Still searching for the future. Hoping that everything's gon come clean and all.
I can boast about my father's wealth and all, but someday someway somehow, he'll be dead.  Everybody's gon die. Thinking bout death send shivers thru my vein.
Bet there's no use of being so mother effin proud of somebody else's success. Coz its not mine. Yeah, not mine.

I wanna feel how he feels like living life with a lot of dough and all.
But what amazes me is, he never really shows all the wealth he got and all. He didn't buy Mercedes Benz for teh lulz. He didn't buy a mansion. He never really pampered all his children with wealth and materialism.
Selfish? Sounds like it. But when i'm growing bigger and have my own self judgement, he's a very reasonable man. He wants me to feel how it feels like having to live a humble and hard life. Thats what i had in my mind.

I can enter any college i wanted to since he had a lot of friends at almost any university available. But he never did that to none of my siblings. "Mane kau dapat tu pergilah". As easy as that, Even when my uncle had offered meself to go to UTP and all. As easy as abc, i myself refuse my uncle's offer. I know my ground. Why should i admit myself to a place where i myself can't cope just to be there.

fuck i don't even know why m writing all these shit.
i just feel like writing.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Friday Prayers Cheaters or Show Off Worshipper

Yeah.
Since its friday, m gon talk about the visibility and alibi every guy on earth could use to defend himself

1. Masing2 check in dekat masjid and pretend being a saint for a moment, padahal lepak tepi sapkok smpi habes smbyg.

2. Dok tepi masjid tapi bukan dengar khutbah, masing2 mengadap telefon2 canggih sambil tweeting

3. Masing2 ingat tajuk khutbah je. The rest? Ulas sendiri. Bagi nampak macam dengar khutbah sampai habes. Pastu masing2 tweet pasal khutbah tadi. Padahal tak dengar pon. heh

Abeh je semua orang sembahyang jumaat, masing2 buat2 baru keluar msjd n balik. Like who knew?

Maybe lepas ni masing2 pergi masjid sebab nak check in dekat masjid. Nampak sikit macam pergi sembahyang, padahal masing2 repeat step 1 sampai 3 ulang2 for the rest of thou life. Kahkahkah.

Niat pergi masjid bukan nak sembahyang, tapi sebab nak check in dekat masjid lepastu oust khatib and jadik mayor masjid. What the fuck?

Nao thats that for today.
Roger n Out.


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

The Truth Nobody Wants To Read

Obefiend is a douchebag.
Everybody knows. He admit it too.
See, this is not an accusation, this is what he prefer to be called of.

He gain fame n notoriety on the net since he was against the norms. Sometimes he tells the truth nobody give a shit about. Like, writing about gay society once he hated so much. But since he wants to change the world's views and wanted to look like a liberal man, he said he's not against them nao, though he perform prayers as much as he can, he still do it, just for the lulz, like he always did.

He used to tell a lot of story about his ex girlfriend. Sorta like a normal bloggers would've done. But since he was dumped, and bad mouthed by her and all, he started to hate her ex gf. Everybody knew this shit. He even post hate-stuff on the blogserius about his gf and deleted it once he realize that he can't face the butthurt and troll all over him. He looks like a future-less guy on the net. I bet his ex gf dumped him because her family couldn't see a good future out of him and and her, financially. U know how parents see their future son in law regarding all the wealth and all. I bet u do.

Trust me, u dont want to be a full time blogger since a blogger don't have a proper life. Just like me.

After he tells his reader about him being dumped and all, all his reader seems like a bunch of caring tards saying soothing words and all on his comment. But everybody knows, they did that because nobody wants obe to stop from writing good shit to read. I know thats harsh but thats that.

I did read his blog too on regular basis. Coz he have substance. And he's quite a thinker that always make me think.

After his break up stuff gone viral, one of his reader ask him to go out. Sorta like a date. Knowing how invulnerable he is, he's an easy target to shoot at. Maybe she's a loner too. A loner would accept anyone on his/her path to do anything to get something. Sounds desperate? Yeah right. It is.

After a couple of session of ice breaking and all, now they're a couple. A lovey dovey couple. The best part is? She gets apart of the attention from his reader. Simple stuff. That always happened when u have sorta intimate connection with famous people. Just like Kahirul Fahmi's girl. She's a nobody. But since she's in relationship with the infamous malaysian golkeeper who help the nation wins the AFF suzuki cup, she's now as famous as his bf are.

The truth sucks. And here it goes. lulz~

Oh, if you dont mind, i bet i know why he blocked me on twitter. Because i said that Blogserius and RWJ have something in common. I bet thats his limit. Trolled? IDK. Ask him. He knows. lulz~


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Implikasi Senyum Kepada Dunia

Ye. Gwa tau. Senyum tu asas kepada kegembiraan.

Gwa faham erti gembira bila ada strangers senyum dekat gwa. Lagi2 bila lu tak kenal langsung strangers tu. And perasaan dia lagi seronok bila yang senyum tu cun macam Jessica Alba.

Memang la semua orang digalakkan senyum and all, tapi gwa tak paham dengan certain manusia ni.

1. Kau suka orang senyum kat kau, tapi kau tak pernah nak senyum kat orang. Lepastu marah bila orang buat muka kat kau. Kau ni bodoh ke ape? Mase kau buat muka kat orang lain kau ade pk perasaan orang lain nak hentak kepala kau laju2? Tapi bila orang lain buat muka kau marah?

Tak semua orang mampu senyum hari2.
Tak semua orang mampu hidup tersenyum walaupun hari yang dilalui hari tu sumpah macam sampah.
Tapi cuba kita considerate sikit. Give n take? Toleransi?

Kalau orang tu selalu ok je tapi satu hari ni dia buat muka tensen memanjang, biaq p la dia nak buat muka kelat ke hape. Tak payah la kau nak sibuk maki dia. Bukan kau tau pon ape jadik kat dia hari ni.

Lain la kalau muka lu orang kelat hari2 tak gheti nak senyum. Senyum kambing pon cukup ler tapi ni tak. Hari2 nak buat muka palat. Kalau tak kesah dengan orang lain yang tak senyum kat dia gwa orait lagi. Ni marah pulak dekat orang yang tak senyum dengan dia. Come on. What u give, u get back. Benda ni semua lumrah hidup.

Kalau rasa hidup nak happy, senyum je kat semua orang regardless of his/her face that day. Your precious smile could always chnage anybody's day.

Gwa pernah rasa down yang amat this one day but prior seeing somebody smiling, and gwa tau senyum dia ikhlas, gwa tak jadik nak marah2 or feeling down lagi. Try em. Mane tau satu hari nanti lu orang dapat rasa ape yang gwa rasa.

Nak senyum kambing pon senyum la, asalkan senyum. lulz~

fuck it, just smile u fucking weirdo.

P/S : orang yang gembira n slalu senyum mempunyai jangka hidup yang lebih lama. Top that!


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Monday, April 4, 2011

Of Boobs and Scrotum

A man is helpless when his scrotum is thinking behalf of his brain.

But woman's boobs is useful in helping her to think behalf of her brain.
(In a particular situation)

How powerful your asset is, bless this word.
Use Your Brain in any situation available. It is useful, the most.


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Mimpi Celaka Yang Tak Indah

Masa : malam
Waktu kejadian : malam semalam
Masa : malam malam
Tempat : Atas katil malam malam

Bangun2 je gwa carik laptop. Kepala hotak gwa kosong. Perut gwa lapar.
Gwa bukak hootsuite, baca blog sepam dua, spam comment kat fesbuk, buat status kat twitter lepastu baru gwa teringat. Masa gwa tido tadi gwa ade mimpi. Mimpi gwa nak bertunang, Oh Fuck!

Gwa muda lagi la celaka. Taknak gwa terikat dengan apa2 relationship yang konon2 dah nak legal ni. Bertunang je pun. Kalau berkahwin lain la cerita. Tapi kawin2 ni bukan child's play. Kalau kawin setakat nak penuhkan kehendak nafsu kote je, gwa yakin masing2 end up dengan anak yang ramai and anak yang terbiar and huru hara.

Fuck it. Mimpi tadi sumpah mimpi ngeri. Gwa hampir bertunang dengan fiona kot. Gwa tak cakap Fiona tu degrading and all tapi gwa hampir bertunang dengan raksasa Gorgon yang tak diketahui asal usulnya. Setakat tu jelah apa yang gwa mampu ingat dari mimpi tadi.

Gwa sendiri tak tau kenapa gwa cakap Yes untuk bertunang and end up cakap No sebelum majlis bertunang tu dilangsaikan. FUCK.

Bila gwa banyak sangat mencarut tu maksudnya gwa serius. Benda yang paling tak boleh blah is gwa dump gf gwa dalam mimpi tu untuk bertunang dengan raksasa Gorgon. Lagi lah celaka.

Gwa tak tau kenapa gwa tulis semua ni kat sini tapi bear in mind you petty human, Marriage is no child's play.  Think before u end the game. Or its GAME OVER.


Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

Friday, April 1, 2011

I Love You

Sehari ada 24 jam
Setia 1 jam ada 60 minit
Aku lorekkan 1 per 24 jam setiap hari untuk kau gunakan setiap hari hanya untuk text, skype, chat and whatever medium available to communicate with your so called lovey dovey bf/gf and all.

Dalam masa 60 minit perbualan, text and all, i bet u received multiple counts of i miss you and i love you sentence from your lover. Segala rasa sayang, gersang, ditaburkan. Rasa sensasi yang menusuk kalbu bila dapat tuturkan kata2 so called 'sacred' dekat orang yang tersayang.

All the depressed things and all joy n happiness being shared. Aku paham. Memang teruja perasaaaaan tu. Macam makan steak. Lamb chop barang sepam dua. Bila zarah2 steak tu masuk dalam mulut and bercampur saliva dari mulut lalu dikunyah kunyah jadik kecil untuk dimuatkan ddekat kerongkong yang besarnya ditentukan makanan yang masuk. Sedap, enak, sumptuous, u name it. 

Don't stray. Aku cuma nak menggambarkan betapa enaknya dapat melafazkan kata2 kat atas. Lagi2 bila lama tak jumpa or lama tak contact and all. Kalau gf/bf tu ade depan mata, dah kena makan agaknye. Kenyang nafsu untuk seketika.

Bagusnya kalau perasaan ghairah tu dapat kekal sampai ikatan sah perkahwinan dapat dilafazkan. Lagi cun kalau semua tu kekal sampai mati. Indahnya dunia.

Tapi gwa jarang nampak manusia bahagia lepas kawin. Kalau kawin je masing2 buat perangai tahi. Janji2 nak sehidup semati tu campak je dalam tongsampah, buang dekat lori angkut sampah DBKL. Ptui...
Ni janji pakai buang ke ape? Politician punya janji pon paling bangsat dia perkenankan barang sedapur dua walaupun tak semua dia buat.

Macam pakai pad or condom or anything disposable. Pakai buang.
Ni ape bebel sampai kawin sampai sampah sampai disposable bagai ni?

Ok. enuff with the rants.
Dalam masa setahun 365 hari lu orang hidup tu, agaknya berapa kali lu orang lafazkan or at least text or chat or whatever it takes untuk sampaikan sayangnya lu orang dekat mak bapak lu orang?
Cuba pergi depan cermin, tanya diri sendiri. Jika anda gagal menjawab dengan jawapan yang munasabah, ketuk kepala tiga kali.

Hamboi, dengan gf/bf kemain i love you i miss you. Kalau boleh nak ikat je bf/gf dekat belakang badan taknak berpisah. Tapi dengan mak bapak lu orang pernah buat macam tu? heh

Lepas ni, ikut turutan yang gwa buat dekat bawah ni
1. Ambik fon. 
2. Pastikan fon ade credit. Text awek ade duit, takkan tang ni takde duit pulak. Gwa siku sorang2 nanti
3. Pegi text, inbox, new message. Dah buat belum?
4. Tulis i love you mom/father. Lagi bagus kalau lu anta message tu satu2 dekat depa. Jangan tipu la. Gwa tau mak bapak lu ade handphone sorang satu.
5. Tekan butang Send.
6. Setel
7. Untung2 depa masukkan fulus dekat bank account lu. lulz~

Lu orang agak2 ape perasaan depa bila terima text tu? Confirm depa cakap. Ni ape anak aku salah send message ke ape? Buang tebiat anak aku ni. Kalau dia call, cakap dengan dia lu orang sayang dekat depa. Bagi dorang rasa ape yang lu rasa setiap kali lu orang terima ayat yang sama dari bf/gf lu orang.
Nak malu ape? Depa yang besarkan lu orang dari kecik sampai besar.

Hah. Gembirakan la pulak manusia yang suap lu makan dari kecik sampai besar tu. Depa tak mintak pon duit lu orang. Bagi depa simple things that'd make em smile. Cukup. Sampai mati pon dia doakan lu tau.
Dah, jangan buang masa. P buat ape yang gwa instruct dekat atas nun. Selamat berkasih sayang. haha~

Tak, ni bukan lawak april fool. Apa kata lu orang buat benda bermakna sikit. Kesian orang bodoh kena bodoh bodohkan hari ni. 

Its my perspective. What's yours?
hit me on the comment section, below~

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails

TnC

Every content of this blog may be MY perspectives generally. BTW, i am not trying to pick a fight with any body, just havin some fun for the sake of Laughter.... PLUS, i need your Brain to read this blog. I dont need your brainless head to interpret my perspectives. more? words inside this blog is not suitable in formal occasion, so, take note. There are more fictions than facts in this blog, don't believe the author too much or u'll have headache for the rest of your life... Gyahahahahah~